Rejection X 20 = depression

My novel codenamed LP has been rejected twenty times by agents now. My novel codenamed BtC has been rejected once by an agent. I've lost count of the number of times my short stories have been rejected. So depression has set in.

I've been writing seriously for five years now, and what do I have to show for it? One short story published, in an online literary journal. I have written six novels, of which four are "starter" novels that will never be seen by an agent or editor. Two of the novels I am proud of, BtC and LP. I am told this is a very bad time to try to get an agent's attention, so maybe I could take some consolation from that, but twenty rejections for LP is tough to take.

What do I do now? Where do I go from here? I entered LP in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award, but I don't have much hope for it - the initial judging is based only on a pitch. I have ideas for four more novels that I have worked on a little. I suppose I will continue to be optimistic and plug away at another novel, probably the one codenamed LL. At this point I have gotten used to writing and creating - I miss it when I am depressed and not writing.

The prospect of never being published is frightening and sobering. It is a very real possibility. Book sales were declining, even before the current financial downturn. And perhaps I am just not good enough. Maybe I will never attract the attention of one of the gatekeepers (the agents) no matter how well I write. It takes a great deal of determination to keep plugging away at it in the face of so much rejection.

Behind the Scenes at the Museum by Kate Atkinson

The story of Ruby and her horrific childhood. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry as I read this. It's dark humor at its best.

Ruby narrates her own conception, and the story gets weirder and sadder from there. Atkinson breaks all the rules and gets away with it, which is what good writing is all about. Not only does Ruby narrate her conception, but we are filled in on the lives of her ancestors in chapter-sized footnotes. Obviously things that Ruby could never know, but the reader doesn't care. It's good writing and it works.

There is even a mystery too, which is what you would expect from Atkinson. The solution is revealed in the climax.

Link to Amazon: Behind the Scenes at the Museum: A Novel

Loving Frank by Nancy Horan

A book with a surprising and shocking ending - and no, I'm not going to spoil it for you. The book is a fictional account of the factual relationship between the architect Frank Lloyd Wright and Mamah (May-muh) Borthwick Cheney. I urge you not to do any research into their affiar before reading the book - it would most certainly spoil the suprising ending.

The ending is the most interesting part of the book. The rest of it is familiar to modern readers. Both Frank and Mamah are married to other people - they both have children. Their affair goes through the familiar pattern of infatuation, love, deception, estrangement from the children, hurting others by selfish actions, shame, guilt, and so forth and so on. This all takes place around 1909, so there was quite a scandal, something that would not really happen today.

If there were solely a novel, the ending would be dismissed, I think, as too sudden and melodramatic. There is certainly not enough foreshadowing of what happens. But since this is fiction based on fact, you can't really argue "that couldn't happen", since it did happen. It's one of the common "rules" presented to fiction writers. Just because something happened that way does not mean that it makes a good story.

So now you will have to read it, to find out what I am talking about and to decide for yourself if the true-life ending makes a satisfying and compelling story.

Piano World online recital

Participated in my first Piano World online recital this month. It's not as stressful as a real recital in front of live people! Here's my tiny little medal:

The Road to Wellville by T. C. Boyle

An outstanding novel. Boyle really outdid himself with this creative treatment of the Kellogg sanitarium and the breakfast food boom centered around Battle Creek Michigan in the early twentieth century.

The novel's dark humor is its most striking aspect. The descriptions of the medical treatments, the enemas, the food at the sanitarium, the lectures by Kellogg, the odd characters who were drawn to the treatments, read like an odd mixture of Faulkner and Dickens. And it has plot! We follow the Will Lightbody and his wife Eleanor on the road to Wellville, along with an assortment of minor characters and subplots. Highly inventive and a great read.

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil by John Berendt

Creative non-fiction, like "In Cold Blood", but I actually like this book much better. It lacks the narrative drive, but the characters are more memorable, and the author does a good job of capturing them. Rather than thinking of it as the story of the murder and the trials, it really more of a portrait of the city of Savannah, at least as seen through the eyes of the author.

Case Histories by Kate Atkinson

Occasionally I find a book so well written that it makes me want to give up my own efforts at writing. This book is nearly perfect - it really speaks to me. It is aptly described as a literary mystery. It has everything that I love in a book. A plot (actually several) that keeps me turning pages. Interesting characters. A "theme" (women as victims). Atkinson weaves together the several sub-plots, springing twists and turns, giving insights into the characters. It's a wonderful book. Now I can't wait to read her other novels.

Piano Lessons have begun

I had my last piano lesson way back in 1973 - thirty-six years ago. I started playing again, on my own, in January of 2008. This year, Laurie got me a couple of months of piano lessons for Christmas, starting in January of 2009. Well, I've had two lessons now ( I take one every two weeks), and decided I would try recording myself to see what I sounded like. The answer is pretty bad. At least this will give me a starting point from which to judge my progress.

How long will I take lessons? I don't know. It is satisfying a need that I have to express myself, and I'm having fun with it. So, if you are brave, have a listen.

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